Benchwarmers II

When they ever decide to make a sequel to Benchwarmers, they should look no further than Michael Owen for inspiration.

What a player he was, back in the day! His pace and finishing won him the Ballon D’Or in 2001. However, his fetish for racehorses and trophies (apparently) led him to leave Liverpool docks and land in Real Madrid during the Galacticos era. One of the best talents from England went to Spain for a measly 8 million pounds. No wonder Liverpool fans hated him since.

Who would’ve thought that Michael Owen would be benched in a team that featured Ronaldo, Figo, Raul, Zidane et al? I bet he didn’t! That’s where the bench warming began, only to be interrupted by days and months spent sitting on the physio table. The poor guy left sunny Spain after Robinho and Julio Baptista (still alive) arrived in Madrid.

Next destination, Newcastle United. 16.8 million pounds transfer fee. 110,000 pounds per week wages. 88 appearances. 29 goals. 4 years. Safe to say, he wasn’t one of the favorites on Tyneside. So he thought, well, Liverpool fans seem to have forgotten me in the last few years; let me grab their attention by joining Manchester United, Liverpool arch-enemies.

Onwards to Old Trafford in 2009, Michael Owen decided to make the bench his own. Since then, he has made 37 appearances from the bench and started only 16 games (only 6 in the EPL). Fast forward to today, he made his presence felt in his first start of the season, by scoring TWO goals against the MIGHTY Aldershot!

In order of time spent in activity by Owen since leaving Liverpool 2004:

1) Argue with Piers Morgan on twitter

2) Chill on the physio table

3) Look interested while sitting on the bench

4) Play football

Stats:

1996 – 2004: 297 appearances, 158 goals

2004 – 2011: 175 appearances, 63 goals

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2 thoughts on “Benchwarmers II

  1. kickingsport says:

    Like it. Most ridiculous thing is that those two goals against Aldershot will have sections of the United-biased media and English supporters calling for him to make the squad next year probably! But in many ways a sad story if we consider what he could have achieved if he’d picked a favourite position which was actually on the pitch.

    • haha. His horse fetish took him down! I feel he should have stayed back at Newcastle United instead of going to MUFC.

      I will die of a heart attack if Owen ever makes it back to the national team.

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